THE LOUDEST PODCAST

(Reactions + Views + Clicks) / Time x Average Retail Price = Total Bullshit I Mean Entergagement

Number 76 will shock you.

Step 1: Google "What is mortgage"

Wondering if you should "Shave It or Leave It?" Email a pic of YOUR dome to theloudestpodcast ayyt gmail dahht chaam -- or tag us on twitter.

Who clogged the toilet: Asterios or Rancho? Sound off in the comments!

Do everything we say, you'll probably be fine

A deep dive into the internet's "number one" ball pit

No, really

We don't do too good

Who knew trying to better yourself would suck shit

Edited + curated by Smarty! Follow him on Twitch.

INCLUDING: Jury Duty, Shit Like An Eagle, Spider Man Wedding, Demi Levato Apology, Twitch Coomer Lawsuit, Funko Or Fakeo, Katlin Bennet Poops, WeWork Implodes, Homestuck Deep Dive & Bang or Boing?

Follow TLP: Spotify | Youtube | Apple Podcasts | Google | Soundcloud 

TLP Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

[rolls a d20] Gordon hates your pizza

Plus: Sirnachos plays OMORI until 5AM + Asterios gets into Binding of Isaac.

RIP...again

the Moment has arrived

[slams button] "WOKE MOMENT!"

Grab an apple and a ballpoint pen and enjoy!

You're welcome.

Rancho + I are taking the holidays off this year! But we didn't want to leave you hanging. Here's an eight-hour super-sode containing:

EVERY INTERVIEW.

EVERY EVICTION NOTICE.

EVERY GARFFUCINNO.

FROM SANDBAGS TO CELIBACY, WE PRESENT TO YOU...

THE ENTIRE GARFIELD EATS SAGA.

AND acid splashed on her face!  

BLACK FRIDAY MERCH DROP:

SPITEINCORPORATED.COM 

Also Big Ed sends a message to TLP! And it's NOT a Cameo!

yup.

WE DO THE MASH.

ONE WILL RISE. ONE WILL FALL.

This dog is totally insane, you would love her

Can YOU win their approval?!

we plan an anime wedding, rancho reads her my immortal fan-fanfic + jump hump & soak talk!

We listen to YOUR voicemails and answer YOUR questions!

New show! First one's free. Hear more episodes over at patreon.com/asterios.

Sirancha attempts to "overdose on weed" in the California desert. Plus, an all new game: "Mexican Food or Fakexican Food?"

Tar-eboni and Volsermort have their final showdown.

Eboni and Young Voldemort go to a Good Charlotte concert.

a FOURTH MCR concert?!

Sirancha does dabs with her dad. Imagine doing dabs with your dad.

Oh god

What happens when you mix Harry Potter, goths and awkward sex into one teenage fanfic? You get the 2006 classic "My Immortal" starring Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way. Enjoy, fello' goffs!

In this special episode, we play the all-new RPG, "Dr. Fauci's American Nightmare." Can the party escape roving vaxxer-gangs and make it to the fabled land of "Marr-Ah Lagg-Go?"

Download the FREE one-page RPG by clicking here.

Follow TLP: Spotify | Youtube | Apple Podcasts | Google | Soundcloud

TLP Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Shop TLP: http://www.spiteincorporated.com

It's teen mom vs. tween mom as reality TV stars sue each other over a failed podcast. And: the Council of Autism gets membership cards!

Follow TLP: Spotify | Youtube | Apple Podcasts | Google | Soundcloud

TLP Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Shop TLP: http://www.spiteincorporated.com

Asterios & Sirancha are both visiting their parents! Sirancha's dad thinks the democrats will soon ban apple pie & Asterios' dad finds fifteen ways to call Derek Chauvin's lawyer fat. Enjoy!

Follow TLP: Spotify | Youtube | Apple Podcasts | Google | Soundcloud

TLP Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Shop TLP: http://www.spiteincorporated.com

Yaoi paddles! Bean hoarding! Stomach waxing! AND: we play the new hit game, "Bang or Boi-oi-oi-oi-ng?"

Frenemies explodes! Chrissy Tiegen grovels! And our newest Patre-o's find out what they'll smell like when they die.

We debate which of us will die first, ASMR the BTS meal + react to Big Ed's shocking yet totally expected phone call! 

A QUARTER MILLION SERVED! Celebrate our 254,300th download as we play "Funko or Fakeo", discuss Asterios becoming "Nutritionpilled" & breakdown the finale of 90 Day Fiance: The Single Life.

Sirancha cries in her ethics class, Asterios get VPN-pilled + we tell you how to join the COUNCIL OF AUTISM!

We got another banger! We read Armie Hammer's darkest thoughts, play America's hottest new game & deliver a double dose of One Piece Minute!

Crypto Chatter! Sirancha pitches "Manties"! And the listeners take the Autism test.

It's our longest episode ever! One Piece Minute returns, we take an autism test live on air, Demi Lovato "apologizes" to a froyo place, and we interview the target market of Barbie movies: an eight year old girl! YOU CAN NOT MISS THIS ONE!!!

Sirancha tries for tradhood! Fat Families delivers huge! And our all-new segment: "Helping You Grow-kkinos with Asterios Kokkinos!"