THE LOUDEST PODCAST
Funko or Fakeo?

Funko or Fakeo?

July 8, 2020

Sirancha breaks her cereal virginity. Asterios is NOT a "dumb gen-x'er." And how many Frankenberry Funkos are there? The answer won't surprise you.

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

The Cereal Cold Wars

The Cereal Cold Wars

July 6, 2020

Lucky the Leprechaun hits Tony the Tiger where it hurts. Sirancha brings in 24 pages of "titty streamers." And a kick-ass hate song about Funko Pops!

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

A “Coomer” Sues Twitch

A “Coomer” Sues Twitch

June 30, 2020

What's on the YouTube Apology Bingo Card? A spooky "new" cereal burns Asterios' beans. And more disturbingly specific fetish chain restaurants!

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Femboy Hooters vs. Goth IHOP vs. Tomboy Outback Steakhouse vs. MILF Denny’s

Femboy Hooters vs. Goth IHOP vs. Tomboy Outback Steakhouse vs. MILF Denny’s

June 22, 2020

Listener Blaz3 calls in from the CHOP. Asterios learns what a "coomer" is. And Sirancha goes all-in on MILF Denny's.

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Sirancha, The Queen of CHAZ

Sirancha, The Queen of CHAZ

June 16, 2020

Asterios dines out on his classic "Richard Karn" story. Sirancha seeks to rule the CHOP. And we launch a new sticker club!

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Russell Greer Sues Taylor Swift Again

Russell Greer Sues Taylor Swift Again

June 8, 2020

Sirancha gleefully recounts an man's meritless lawsuits. Asterios discovers he's not good at protesting. And the french fry debate gets crispier.

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Which Boomer Tier Restaurants Should Close Forever?

Which Boomer Tier Restaurants Should Close Forever?

June 1, 2020

What's the best kinda french fry? Is lithium as awesome as it sounds? Why would an influencer "return" a kid she adopted from China after making content with him for three years? All that + some Jake Paul dunking on this week's TLP.

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri (w/GarfGAB!)

Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri (w/GarfGAB!)

May 25, 2020

Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri Nathen Mazri

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Sirancha Explains 90 Day Fiancé

Sirancha Explains 90 Day Fiancé

May 18, 2020

Asterios holds the UK's Judge Rinder in contempt. Sirancha promises to not talk about "No-Neck Ed." And is "nugget" a good name for a bird?

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

“Star Wars: Bad Form RPG” feed drop!

“Star Wars: Bad Form RPG” feed drop!

May 17, 2020

I got invited on a Star Wars RPG podcast! They're called "Bad Form", and they're really funny. Give 'em a listen, and subscribe if you like it.

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Sirancha vs. Fake Weebs

Sirancha vs. Fake Weebs

May 11, 2020

Asterios searches for COVID antibuddies. Sirancha wants the Paw Patrol to work smarter, not harder. And that sexy dog from Animal Crossing has arrived!

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Boomer Crossing

Boomer Crossing

May 6, 2020

Sirancha shows off her lovely loaves. Asterios "punches up" an essential worker celebration. And both become addicted to Tetris 99.

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Sirancha vs. Applebees

Sirancha vs. Applebees

April 27, 2020

Sirancha goes "South Of The Border." Asterios buys "loosies." And YOU donated 2,500 tampons to "Sisters With Purpose." Nice!

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Asterios & Sirancha Play “C*** Wars”

Asterios & Sirancha Play “C*** Wars”

April 19, 2020

Sirancha ranks 11th in the world at "Fap Titans." Asterios tries to join his trolling heroes. And Nathen has had it with Google reviews.

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

We Review “Anna’s Rules For Marrying A Billionaire”

We Review “Anna’s Rules For Marrying A Billionaire”

April 13, 2020

Sirancha starts her day screaming about Cats. Asterios finds a new obsession in 1:64 die-cast race cars. And Joe Biden's podcast is about...Fig Newtons?

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

Sirancha’s Game Corner: “Fap Titans”

Sirancha’s Game Corner: “Fap Titans”

April 6, 2020

Sirancha reviews "Fap Titans." Sirancha also reviews "Poker Sluts." Finally, Sirancha reviews, "Sex Gangsters."

(848) 863 5343 -|- theloudestpodcast@gmail.com -|- patreon.com/asterios

The GarfieldEATS Guy Is Upset With Us + We Fix Frozen 2

The GarfieldEATS Guy Is Upset With Us + We Fix Frozen 2

March 30, 2020
Asterios fixes Frozen 2. 
 
Sirancha fixes Asterios' fixes.
 
And Nathen calls out Sierra Santana, Girl Reporter.
 
 
* * *
 
Voicemail: (848) 863 5343
 
 
 
 
* * * 
 
 
 
PO Box 90700
Brooklyn, NY 11209-9997
 
Buy stuff through Amazon and we get paid for it here: https://www.amazon.com/?&_encoding=UTF8&tag=asterios08-20
 
Nathen Mazri: Coronavirus Truther

Nathen Mazri: Coronavirus Truther

March 23, 2020

Bold moves are made at Overeaters Anonymous. 

Every Hayden apologizes except the guilty one. 

And introducing...Sierra Santana: Girl Reporter. 

Read the rest of this entry »

DarkSyde Jills #1: Piss Jug: The Podcast

DarkSyde Jills #1: Piss Jug: The Podcast

March 20, 2020

Sirancha knew a man who pissed in a jug.

Niko also knew a man who pissed in a jug.

Who's piss jug story is worse? That's for YOU to decide!

Like all good drugs, the first one's free. To get future episodes, subscribe to patreon.com/asterios

The Lime & The Kokkinos #1: Fanboy & Chum Chum vs D.C. Follies

The Lime & The Kokkinos #1: Fanboy & Chum Chum vs D.C. Follies

March 19, 2020
LimeJinjo unleashes the horror that is Fanboy & Chum Chum
 
Asterios returns the favor, with a trip to D.C. Follies
 
Neither will ever be the same. 
 
Like all great drugs, the first one's free. To hear future episodes, subscribe to patreon.com/asterios.
Asterios Kills A Kid Saves Everyone

Asterios Kills A Kid Saves Everyone

March 18, 2020
Asterios gives his worst advice yet. 
 
Sirancha learns about "Uber, but for private planes." 
 
And a coin-stealin' criminal leaves a very angry voicemail. 
 
Sirancha Gets Adult Braces

Sirancha Gets Adult Braces

March 9, 2020
Asterios gets rejected by Ex-Lax. 
 
Sirancha encounters yet another drive-thruumer. 
 
And Tallard is NOT allowed to use the camera we're "borrowing" from Target. 
 
 
* * * 
 
Voicemail: (848) 863 5343 
 
Who Are The Best And Worst Babies?

Who Are The Best And Worst Babies?

March 1, 2020

Asterios tells Sirancha about the baby from Dinosaurs.

Sirancha tells Asterios about various sex criminals.

And we read your emails. Unfortunately.

 

* * *

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios 

Who Is Mike Bloomberg’s Secret Crush?

Who Is Mike Bloomberg’s Secret Crush?

February 24, 2020

Asterios makes a serious financial mistake. 

Sirancha hunts down a mystery MILF. 

And Mike Bloomberg gets curbstomped! 

 

* * * 

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

1st Anniversary Special! We Saw The Sonic Movie

1st Anniversary Special! We Saw The Sonic Movie

February 18, 2020

Sirancha fights the recline of western society.

Asterios calls the cops.

And the winner of the Replacement Rancha contest is announced!

 

* * *

Do you have the "right to recline?" Voat! https://strawpoll.com/zb7gb4hd

 

* * * 

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Sirancha Makes The Front Page of /r/AmITheAsshole

Sirancha Makes The Front Page of /r/AmITheAsshole

February 10, 2020

Sirancha trolls her way to the top.

Asterios learns about Daniel "Danny" Phantom.

And Niko the Well Endowed Goth Woman mocks the dead once again.

* * * 

Who's the best Replacement Rancha? Vote here: www.patreon.com/posts/33912732

* * * 

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Asterios Goes To Overeaters Anonymous

Asterios Goes To Overeaters Anonymous

February 3, 2020

Asterios kills during his "addict share."

Sirancha pitches a new way to stay on the toilet.

And Weezerfan420 seeks to date anything with a pulse.

 

Voicemail:(848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Sirancha Gets Banned From Amazon & Reddit (Again)

Sirancha Gets Banned From Amazon & Reddit (Again)

January 28, 2020

Sirancha gets banned from the Amazon bookstore.

Sirancha also gets banned from Reddit's /r/AmITheAsshole.

Asterios is still welcome in both places!

 

* * *

Vote for who's McDonalds Top 5 is better: https://strawpoll.com/x5g5d671

 

*  *  *

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Worms On A String

Worms On A String

January 20, 2020

Sirancha gets some fuzzy new pets.

Asterios thanks his various "guys."

And Judge WeezerFan420 presides over...

...THE TROLL TRIAL.

 

*  *  *

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

We Went To Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge

We Went To Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge

January 12, 2020

Sirancha drunk drives the Millennium Falcon.

Asterios stands up for Dwight Schrute.

And what's the better alcoholic milk: blue or green?

 

*  *  *

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Sirancha Gets Banned From Reddit

Sirancha Gets Banned From Reddit

January 6, 2020
Asterios eats at a steampunk themed chocolatorium.
 
Geek girls are mean to Sirancha.
 
And Baby Yoda gets punched.
 
 

*  *  *

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Have A Harakiri Christmas

Have A Harakiri Christmas

December 30, 2019

Sirancha's mom engages in Christmas gift oneupsmanship.

Asterios' mom sends our hosts to the Galaxy's Edge.

And chocolate milk eases mee maw to the great beyond.

 

*  *  *

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

We Saw Star Wars: Rise of the Skywalker

We Saw Star Wars: Rise of the Skywalker

December 23, 2019

Asterios pulls on Garfield's potato tail.

Sirancha demands more birds in her children's movies.

And is the McChicken the key to everything?

 

*  *  *

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Dabbin’ On Tampons (For Charity)

Dabbin’ On Tampons (For Charity)

December 16, 2019

Sirancha ruins Santacon.

Asterios snaps into a Slim Jim.

And introducing: Mashed Potate, the drywall-eating Christmas porg.

 

* * *

We're running a holiday tampon drive for homeless shelters.

Email proof of donation to asterios.kokkinos@gmail.com and we will dab on YOU, live on our holiday livestream.

Here's all the easy ways you can give:

1. Fill our PO box with tampons! Unopened boxes, please.

PO Box 90700
Brooklyn, NY 11209-9997

You can buy 'em and ship 'em, or use Amazon or another service to send 'em directly to us.

 

2. Send us cash! We'll go out, buy the tampons, and ship 'em ourselves.

paypal: asterios.kokkinos@gmail.com
venmo: @asterios

 

3. Send tampons directly to the charity:

I Support the Girls
Attn: Dana Marlowe
P.O. Box 2736
Wheaton, Maryland 20915

 

4. Donate directly to the charity:

https://isupportthegirls.org/get-involved/financial-donation-to-i-support-the-girls/

Tight At The Museum

Tight At The Museum

December 9, 2019

Sirancha embarks on a new career.

Asterios coins several pornographic phrases.

And Adam Neumann hands out tequila shots at the worst possible time.

 

*  *  *

Voicemail: (848) 863 5343

Email: theloudestpodcast@gmail.com

Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

COPPA will take your parents away if you are under 13!

COPPA will take your parents away if you are under 13!

December 3, 2019

Sirancha issues a grave warning to tweens.

Asterios gets dunked on by his shitposting niece.

And HOW many turkeys were stolen this thanksgiving?

http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Anti-Dabbing Advocate

Anti-Dabbing Advocate

November 25, 2019

Sirancha does the "Mayo Pete" dance.

Asterios pitches his services to the Saudi Arabian government.

And Wumpus gets a new attitude!

http://www.patreon.com/asterios

/r/Are We The A**holes?

/r/Are We The A**holes?

November 18, 2019

Sirancha wonders if we're the a**holes.

Asterios wonders if we're the a**holes.

And you will wonder:

...are YOU the a**hole?

 

http://www.patreon.com/asterios

From Ragtime to Lo-Fi

From Ragtime to Lo-Fi

November 11, 2019

Sirancha drinks a gallon of water for water rights.

Stuffin' destroys a flower pot.

And Asterios finally learns how tampons work.

At age 37.

http://www.patreon.com/asterios

 

* * *

1st Lo-Fi track from Mimi-Yori! She also made the amazing Sirancha-mation:
https://twitter.com/mahiyos/status/1182930292618645510

2nd Lo-FI track by the incredible Bagel Titan:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rIdRzx70dAY&feature=youtu.be

Sirancha’s Back!

Sirancha’s Back!

November 4, 2019

Sirancha returns from the war.

And everyone agrees: she must never leave again.

Welcome her back with the hashtag: #SiranchaDontGo

http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Replacement ‘Ranchas: Round #1

Replacement ‘Ranchas: Round #1

October 22, 2019

WeezerFan 420 harnesses the power of anime.

Napsy Lev gets way too high.

And Lauz wins a lapdance at a Smash Bros tournament.

http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Waifu Wars #8: I Now Pronounce You…Creepy (Pyrrah Nikos from RWBY vs Lynn from Fire Emblem)

Waifu Wars #8: I Now Pronounce You…Creepy (Pyrrah Nikos from RWBY vs Lynn from Fire Emblem)

October 14, 2019

Alec loves Pyrrah. Nostromo loves Lynn. And Sirancha loves when the episode ends so she can get these creepy manchildren out of her apartment.

Get the video version & 3 years of bonus content for a single $2 pledge: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Thanks to JJ, Had & KashKash who did an incredible job editing this episode. You can follow KashKash here:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCFaQt04gPBxKc04Ndh84W4w

Announcing…The Replacement ‘Rancha Candidates!

Announcing…The Replacement ‘Rancha Candidates!

October 7, 2019

Replacement 'Rancha candidates are carefully chosen.

Did we choose...YOU?

Tune in & find out...

 

Also: we're having meetups this month! Come replace 'rancha LIVE:

#1. Saturday, October 12th @ 1pm EST

Parrot Palooza 2019 @ Bird Paradise
551 E. Route 130 South
Burlington, NJ 08016

#2. Saturday, October 19th @ 1pm EST

Corn Maze Cafe @ Cherry Crest Adventure Farm
(yes, it's a cafe inside a corn maze)
150 Cherry Hill Rd,
Ronks, PA 17572

#3. Saturday, October 26th @ 1pm EST

International Replacement 'Rancha Day
On discord (applicants, you'll get the link in your email soon)

The Corrupt Monarchy of Barbie Princess Charm School

The Corrupt Monarchy of Barbie Princess Charm School

September 30, 2019

Sirancha takes us to Charm School.

Asterios obsesses over a face tattoo.

And who killed Barbie's mom, who is also Barbie?

* * *

Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-loudest-podcast/id1382951937 

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6NPjuVErySvaCor8tvQwLa

 

* * *

Send us crazy stuff:

8801 5th Ave
PO Box 90700
Brooklyn, NY 11209-9997

 

* * * 

Buy stuff through Amazon and we get paid for it here:

https://www.amazon.com/?&_encoding=UTF8&tag=asterios08-20

Memes For A Job Interview

Memes For A Job Interview

September 23, 2019

A very sexy doctor gives Asterios very bad news.

Sirancha guesses what's in Jon Arbuckle's Marinara Sauce.

And both play a dangerous meme-based workplace icebreaker...

* * * 

Support THE LOUDEST PODCAST!

Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-loudest-podcast/id1382951937 

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6NPjuVErySvaCor8tvQwLa

* * *

Send us crazy stuff:

8801 5th Ave
PO Box 90700
Brooklyn, NY 11209-9997

* * * 

Buy stuff through Amazon and we get paid for it here:

https://www.amazon.com/?&_encoding=UTF8&tag=asterios08-20

Live in Detroit

Live in Detroit

September 20, 2019

Coming to you live from the Lutheran Friends Church in Detroit, Michigan.

Taped August 26th, 2019.

Soberdelic Party

Soberdelic Party

September 9, 2019

Sirancha drinks a gallon of water for gay rights.

Asterios nearly drowns on air.

And both attend a "Sober" party in Deepest Brooklyn.

http://www.patreon.com/asterios
 

* * *

Send us crazy stuff:

8801 5th Ave
PO Box 90700
Brooklyn, NY 11209-9997

* * * 

Buy stuff through Amazon and we get paid for it here:

https://www.amazon.com/?&_encoding=UTF8&tag=asterios08-20

GarfieldEATS Review

GarfieldEATS Review

September 2, 2019

Sirancha tries GarfieldEATS.

Asterios tries GarfieldEATS.

And GarfieldEATS tries to kill us both.

http://www.patreon.com/asterios

* * *

Send us crazy stuff:

8801 5th Ave
PO Box 90700
Brooklyn, NY 11209-9997

* * * 

Buy stuff through Amazon and we get paid for it here:

https://www.amazon.com/?&_encoding=UTF8&tag=asterios08-20

Bonus! Princesses & Porgs #1: Ice Cold Stuffins

Bonus! Princesses & Porgs #1: Ice Cold Stuffins

August 27, 2019

We're on tour this week, so enjoy this episode from our PATREON EXCLUSIVE D&D campaign, "The One Woman Party."

To hear the next episode, give us your two bucks: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

Don’t Say The B-Word At The Airport

Don’t Say The B-Word At The Airport

August 19, 2019

Sirancha joins the war in Indonesia. 

Asterios overcomplicates the search for her replacement. 

And fuck you, Boingo.

http://www.patreon.com/asterios