Asterios Talks To Strangers #5: Metal Gear REBUTTAL With Metal Gear Expert Merlot Williams

December 13, 2018

Last week, I spoke to Metal Gear Continuity Expert Drivershaft. I learned about ALL the snakes, even the fake snakes who AREN'T snakes, and I THOUGHT I knew all about the snakes!

But THEN...a guy named Merlot Williams contacted me and said Drivershaft didn't know SHIT about Metal Gear, and HE, Merlot Williams, would set me straight!

WHO KNOWS THE MOST ABOUT METAL GEAR?! Vote!

http://www.strawpoll.me/17020253

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Boomer vs. Zoomer #8: Endgame

December 8, 2018

We're in the endgame now. Asterios quit the podcast after the edgier videos of my past resurfaced on his YouTube recommended feed. Meanwhile, Andy Signore reacts to the new Avengers trailer, the degradation of Naruto's themes continues to disappoint fans years later, and the screenwriter of Shrek said the N word.

Your hosts:
Asterios Kokkinos ► https://twitter.com/asterios
Mumkey Jones ► https://www.instagram.com/mumkeyjonestv/

Send emails and voicemails to BoomerVsZoomer@gmail.com by means of https://vocaroo.com

Patreon:
Asterios ► https://www.patreon.com/asterios
Mumkey ► https://www.patreon.com/mumkey

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Asterios Talks To Strangers #4: Metal Gear Continuity Expert Drivershaft

December 6, 2018

A podcast to surpass Metal Gear!

There, that's pretty much all I know about this game. That, and he hides under a cardboard box, and that he did that in Smash Brothers, and it was cute. But it's about time I get hip to this Snake-man and his neverending war against-or-for communism in the 1970's. So I sit down with Patreon supporter and Metal Gear expert "Drivershaft" to finally learn enough to fake a conversation!

As a bonus, here's clips of me dying during Metal Gear: Ground Zeroes

https://clips.twitch.tv/DeadNiceAnteaterHumbleLife

https://clips.twitch.tv/PiercingBoxyOrangeOMGScoots

https://clips.twitch.tv/PluckyTallToothStrawBeary

https://clips.twitch.tv/NeighborlyAbrasiveSaladBloodTrail 

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Boomer vs. Zoomer #7: Boomer Law

December 1, 2018
 
Lawsuits, lawsuits, lawsuits! The hot new trend adored by Boomers and Zoomers alike! This week we obsess over some of the hottest ongoing lawsuits of the year, including lawsuits against Mumkey, lawsuits against Asterios, hilarious updates to the Andy Signore lawsuit, and much more!   
 
Your hosts: 
Asterios Kokkinos ► https://twitter.com/asterios 
 
Patreon: 
 
Send emails and voicemails to BoomerVsZoomer@gmail.com by means of https://vocaroo.com 
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Porg Chatter #12: A Porg Chatter Thanksgiving

November 22, 2018
This week, we discuss the crypto crash, Asterios' awful alarm clock, The Good Doctor, mailed-in-a-box meats, MadBondz, drug addictions, McDonalds cups, and...PORGS-GIVING! 

Art by the amazing Magi. They did it for free just to be cool, so please follow them at @magipicsandsuch on Twitter!

 
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Boomer vs. Zoomer #6: Detective Pikachu, Generational Bridge

November 17, 2018

This week on BOOMER vs ZOOMER we take a cringe walk down memory lane as Mumkey recalls some of his most regretful years. Meanwhile, Mumkey's Grandma calls in with some important life updates, Asterios gives his hot take on Ryan Reynolds playing Detective Pikachu, and Mumkey does his best Asterios impression.

Your hosts:
Asterios Kokkinos ► https://twitter.com/asterios
Mumkey Jones ► https://www.instagram.com/mumkeyjonestv/

VOTE:
Did the trailer make you more or less excited to see Detective Pikachu? ►https://www.strawpoll.me/16856807

Send emails and voicemails to BoomerVsZoomer@gmail.com by means of https://vocaroo.com

Patreon:
Asterios ► https://www.patreon.com/asterios
Mumkey ► https://www.patreon.com/mumkey

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Generic Wrestling Podcast #4: Generic Forced Interbrand Conflict PPV

November 17, 2018

Hey, our 4th PPV in a month. This doesn't feel like work to follow, that's for sure! We break down the Survivor Series card, Eric reminisces about the Miz's old face turn, and I pitch a surefire way to fix Auska's booking that the WWE will NEVER do. Enjoy!

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Boomer vs. Zoomer #5: Zoomer vs. Groomer

November 11, 2018

VIDJEOhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybtjqeDocA4

What's up Boomers, Zoomers, and Groomers alike? It's episode 5 of your favorite podcast to feature a boomer and a zoomer--BOOMER vs ZOOMER! This week we address the serious allegations that Asterios is a groomer, Asterios tells the tale of how he saved a rare Chinese duck, and Mumkey feels a spiritual connection to Dan Schneider's carnal desires. Also I'm pretty sure this is the first episode where we don't mention Andy Signore, but maybe I just missed it.

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Asterios Kills A Kid #8: Satirical ID

November 9, 2018

What to eat when you're high, how to get a fake ID, and more kid's questions are discussed SATIRICALLY with SATIRE this episode.

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Boomer vs. Zoomer #4: My Mumkey, My Masterson & Me

November 3, 2018

Welcome to episode 77 of Biggest Boomer in the Zoomiverse.

Unfortunately Asterios couldn't make it this week because I saw him leave a wedding with my ex girlfriend, but we've got famed satirist and host of The Dick Show DICK MASTERSON here to take his place as a Boomer expert. This week we discuss Andy Signore for the first time ever, Asterios and Mumkey fondly recall the time their girlfriends made out, and Dick lists the Top 10 reasons why you should check out a website called MEATSPIN.

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Voyagerges 002: Creative Differences

November 1, 2018
What do you do when you're three seasons deep and out of ideas?
 
You get META, baby!
 
This week, we discuss VOY 3x24, "Worst Case Scenario."
 

Waifu Wars 007: The Criminal In My Apartment

October 30, 2018

WATCH HERE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvDS-x3Ohcc

ok forget the cartoon girls i should not have let these three people into my apartment and given them my cell phone number. they're all insane. each one crazier than the last. one of them goes off on supervillian monologues and the other made a "joke" about carrying illegal weapons then quickly tried to correct his "joke" but it's like...dude, we know. anyway, it's a girl from my superhero academy vs a girl from "kill a la kill" vs a third girl on this week's waifu wars!

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Boomer vs. Zoomer #3: Why Do BOOMERS Love THE MINIONS???

October 28, 2018

After a week hiatus, we're back with more Boomer/Zoomer action! Despite the extra week to refine our discombobulated minds, we still haven't fully recovered from the infamous Andy Signore interview from the previous episode! Meanwhile, we attempt to answer the universe's oldest questions from the perspective of our respective generations: Who was Captain N? What is the difference between Boomer and Zoomer bullying? Is ABBA the greatest band of all time? WHY DO BOOMERS LOVE MINIONS? What would a Virtual Reality Boomer Paradise look like? All this and more on the third episode of BOOMER VS ZOOMER!

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Porg Chatter #11: Orlando: The Mecca of Porgs

October 25, 2018

Henlo it’s Skinachos. Asterios won’t let me watch anime until I write this post copy, so enjoy this episode of Porg Chatter before I put myself in an Idolm@ster coma like the worthless piece of human garbage that I am. Speaking of rotting garbage, in this episode, we return from the Mecca of Porgs: Orlando, Florida. I have recently come into possession of three new sons:

Caffeine (a coffee cup with a lobotomy)

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Boomer vz. Zoomer #2: Andy Signore, Zoomer Hero

October 13, 2018

We're back for episode two with a very special guest: Andy Signore, the creator of Honest Trailers, Movie Fights, and multiple enraged Twitter accounts. Is Andy innocent of the various claims multiple parties have made against him? Did he listen to episode one of this podcast before agreeing to come on for episode two? Will Asterios quit the show in a fit of righteous indignation? All this and more this week on BOOMER vs ZOOMER!

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Boomer vs Zoomer #1: Pilot

October 6, 2018

I'm Asterios Kokkinos, and in meme terms, I'm a goddamn boomer. I'm 37 years old. I got the original Nintendo for christmas and freaked the fuck out. I remember a time when we didn't have an internet, and mobile phones were only for assholes like Zach Morris...the ultimate boomer.

I'm friends with a hilarious man named Mumkey Jones, who's a goddamn zoomer. He's 23 years old. He probably grew up with a Playstation Vita or something, or I dunno, maybe he was crazy into Minecraft or...man I honestly have no idea. 

And that's kinda what this podcast is about! A boomer and a zoomer, coming together every week and trying to understand each other...while discussing whatever stupid fucked up shit is happening in the world these days. 

But secretly, this podcast is just an excuse for me to talk to one of the funniest dudes I know. There's no way he'll read this so don't tell him.

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Generic Wrestling Podcast #2: Generic Australian Government Funded Entertainment Event

October 4, 2018

Who won "The Hell In The Cell?" Certainly not the people who paid hundreds of dollars to not see a finish!

But also: not me. I think Eric beat me by a point or two -- I called The Shield to win both the tag match AND the cage match, and I was dead wrong. Who'd guess the WWE would start protecting its heels?!

This month, we suss out who'll win or lose at The Great Australian Bash, or whatever the hell it's called. And: from now on, we'll be streaming these episodes LIVE, right after the go-home Smackdown, at 10pm EST. So subscribe to youtube.com/asterios for a notification! 

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Asterios Kills A Kid #7: Women Sure Are Complicated

October 4, 2018

Boys Discover These 3 Tricks to Finding Love. Can You Guess Them All? (Hint: Fortnite)

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Asterios Talks To Strangers #3: Zwick Appreciation Week!

October 1, 2018

More people could use a little Zwick in their lives!

That's why I'm launching ZWICK APPRECIATION WEEK. It's a campaign to tell content creators about America's Favorite Editor Boi, and find ways for them to work together.

Why would I share my secret weapon? Because he's so goddamn good, I know he could help a LOT of people. Podcasters would sound better, YouTubers would have crisper looking videos...he could make everyone's stuff funnier and lives easier!

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Porg Chatter #10: Tallard

September 27, 2018
 
Ohayo gozaimasu! It’s Srirancha back with a brand new track—and it’s a new episode of Porg Chatter!
 
Yesterday, I got so high that I forgot how to work my own limbs. But you know whodoesn’t need help using his arms and legs to move her fat lil body? Not Tallard, my new 4ft tall porg—she’s massive.  And also not real. I recently made a video on Twitch unboxing Tallard, which some of you Jesus-needing fucks apparently found sexual. There’s nothing sexual about the pure unbridled love between a girl and her 4ft tall chubby baby. On this episode of Porg Chatter, we review Tallard and discuss whether or not she came from an abusive household. Thanks for listening! 
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The Asterios Showkkinos #0-B: Sanctions Away, Maddox!

September 26, 2018

Break's time's over, Maddox!

Today, the dashing & debonair Jordan Greenberger asked for sanctions to be scheduled against Maddox, "Jane Doe" & Kevin Landau.

Maddox committed a fraud on the courts...and it's time to face the RAMOS-FICATIONS!

Read the full letter at: https://iapps.courts.state.ny.us/nyscef/ViewDocument?docIndex=Lu7HI_PLUS_8lGOQRbpqGpKI4jw==

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The Five Minute Podcast: Island Time

September 21, 2018

Sirancha and I are in Orlando writing a new book and visiting my MOMMY!

We were doing some classic shitposting at the classic chain restaurant "Bahama Breeze" when longtime listener Brady offered us $15 to do a 5MP right on the spot.

So I whipped out my iPhone and hit record...here's what happened!

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Generic Wrestling Podcast #1: Generic Hell In A Cell Main Event

September 16, 2018

I love wrestling, and I bet some of the people in this audience do to! 

In this new show, me and my old college bestie Larnock The Destroyer predict who's gonna win WWE PPV matches each month. 

We keep score, and the loser has to suffer a deliciously ironic punishment.

It's like an Oscar pool, but with even less logic!

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Science Friction 024: Longboned

September 14, 2018

We're back! After a long hiatus spent making 983 other podcasts, Science Friction warps in with all-new episode!

And this time, we embrace the NEW. Forget that crusty ol' TNG – this week, we review episodes of 2018's hottest sci-fi shows, including Lost In Space, The Expanse and Altered Carbon.

Never heard of those shows? Me neither – I googled "new sci-fi that the kids like" and just rolled with it, baby!

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Porg Chatter #9: Porg Law

September 7, 2018

The fuck? I'm not even IN this episode! Some Asterios Kokkinos Podcast Factory this turned out to be...here's the description from the Mother of Porgs herself, Siranche:

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The Asterios Showkkinos #0-A: The Parker Luck

September 4, 2018

It's The Parker Luck, and I've got it bad. And that's good news for Maddox.

BUT: eventually, Peter Parker wins. You can't run from justice forever, George!

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The Asterios Showkkinos #0: The Ticking Clock

August 30, 2018

I'm being sued. I'm still being sued. I might be being sued forever. Here's the story!

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Asterios Kills A Kid #6: Kick His Hopes & Dreams

August 23, 2018

For the first and last time, Asterios kills some adults.

Producer Jesse here! We've had a whole gaggle of callers since our last episode went live, which is great. Thank you all so much for leaving your voicemails at (347) 705-7617, and for submitting questions through the site.

That said, you all know this is a kid's advice podcast right? Because a few of these callers were obviously not... well here's a taste of the voicemails we received.

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Voyagerges #1: That’s Not How Evolution Works

August 16, 2018
Is Voyager as bad as we remember?
 
As a kid, I gave Voyager like 6 episodes before getting bored. And I remember thinking to myself, "That's weird, I literally cry if I miss an episode of Deep Space Nine. Why don't I care about this show?"
 
I didn't hate Janeway, Chakotay, or Tuvok. I didn't hate the ship, the CGI or the music. I even liked the premise -- Star Trek meets Lost In Space, which was a show I knew an UNUSUAL amount about for a teenager in the 90's.
 
In the 2000's, the internet becomes a Voyager hate machine. The internet hates Voyager so much that I start to think, "God, was it THIS bad, or were we just disappointed in Star Trek as a whole?"
 
In the 2010's, the internet becomes a Voyager LOVE FEST. Everyone's watching it on Netflix and talking about how it had "a lot of good episodes" and how "Seven of Nine was pretty great" and "Robert Picardo was awesome" and I think:
 
Wait, was I wrong about Voyager?
 
So that's what this new addition to the Asterios Kokkinos Podcast Factory is all about. I'm gonna talk to Voyager fans and watch Voyager episodes and see if I can figure out what the hell's going on here.
 
I hope you enjoy our first episode, featuring Ballard Boyd, segment director for The Late Show with Stephen Colbert!
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Porg Chatter #8: Hygiene

August 9, 2018

Sirancha continues to torture me with her "Best Debate" parody series in this week's episode of PORG CHATTER!

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Waifu Wars 006: Please Ignore Those Gunshots Outside with Assburger & Mumkey Jones!

July 31, 2018

please support me on patreon so i can continue to buy crab pizza for the people who come to my apartment: http://www.patreon.com/asterios

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Porg Chatter #7: There Is No Porgcast

July 26, 2018

Sirancha and I have a new porg!

He's Wallard's brother, but he's very small, so his name is...SMOLLARD:

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Asterios Kills A Kid #5: Big, Soft & Cushiony

July 19, 2018

To Catch a Thrift-Shop-Owner, getting mean taunts out of your orbit, and what to do when you discover your teacher's twitter account...

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Asterios Talks To Strangers #2: The Phone Losers

July 16, 2018

What if you could make your living by pissing people off?

That's what Brad Carter of The Phone Losers does. He's a professional prank caller, having made over 30,000 calls since the late 70's.

He puts out FOUR shows a week (two just for his patreons), was called a "corporate terrorist" by CNBC, and is currently on probation for prank calling a Safeway so hard that they ran crying to the FBI.

He's a genuine comedy hero of mine, and I hope you enjoy our chat!

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Porg Chatter #6: Population Control

July 5, 2018

Porgs don't use alcohol to escape their problems. They're only addiction is hugs! 

Sadly, Sirancha and I aren't porgs. We open this episode with a, frankly, unusually sincere conversation about how we both need to drink a little less.

But then we talk about Porgs so it's all ok, my dudes!

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Asterios Talks To Strangers #1: Izzy Nobre

June 29, 2018

YES, IT'S ANOTHER NEW PODCAST!!

I know a lot of cool people! Do YOU? If not, you will soon...because I'm forcing them to talk to me on my new podcast, "Asterios Talks To Strangers!"

This week, we talk to my ol' pal Izzy Nobre. He's a Canadian/Brazilian YouTube star known for being a huge goddamn nerd about everything. I order you to love him!!

Asterios Talks To Strangers joins Waifu Wars, Science Friction, Asterios Kills A Kid, Porg Chatter and The Hour-Long Five-Minute Podcast in The Asterios Kokkinos Podcast Factory. Why do I make content like this, instead of like a normal person? I'm not sure! Maybe I'm afraid I'll get bored of making the same show every week? Let's not think about it too hard!

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Porg Chatter #5: Twitch Chatter [7,000 Download Special]

June 20, 2018

They said it couldn't be done!

They said that there was no way a podcast about porgs would EVER hit 7,000 downloads!

And YOU PROVED THEM WRONG.

Porg Chatter, the only podcast in the world that is EXCLUSIVELY about porgs, just crossed the magic 7,000 download mark. The established mark of excellence and quality for ALL podcasts, porg-centric or otherwise! 7,000 downloads! Let's hear it for ourselves!!

AND HERE'S TO 7,000 MORE EPISODES OF PORG CHATTER!! YES!! YES!! THIS IS NOT A MEME AND WE ARE REALLY DOING THIS

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Science Friction 023: Catfish Fan Fiction

June 14, 2018

THIS WEEK'S MISSION:

If you're anything like me, you've often wondered, "Where's Katie Sackhoff?" She killed it as Starbuck on BSG...so where'd she go? In this episode...WE FIND OUT!

THIS WEEK'S CREW:

SF023 stars two of my favorite podcasters: Kevin Cole & Jeff Pennington.

Kevin DM's a D&D podcast called Pretend Friends, and Jeff runs a Star Trek podcast called M-Class. I love both of these dudes, and after you listen, you will too!

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Waifu Wars 005: Sirancha Strikes Back!

June 8, 2018

Watch the video here! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0hjZWAYehr4

Wow. Well, we were gonna have a fun debate in this episode, but Sirancha kinda short circuits one of the girls immediately by pointing out their dark, criminal past. I gotta say -- this may have been the most fun I've had on Waifu Wars, just watching Sirnachos go ham in an anime debate.

If you wanna see Waifu Wars four days early, pledge for just a buck at patreon.com/asterios

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Porg Chatter #4: Porgs Energy

May 31, 2018
 
"PORGS!" It's not just something you scream during sex...it's also the name of the latest canonical Star Wars cartoon, "PORGS!" 
 
And we review the fuck out of "PORGS!" on this all-new episode of Porg Chatter. You can watch the two minute short, "PORGS!", by clicking here.
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Waifu Wars 004: Three Waifus, One Weeb

May 14, 2018

i had to get REAL tore up to sit through this. it's a weird discussion where some guy, i guess he's youtube famous or something (his name is "Wang?") keeps talking about these cartoons like they're pieces of meat and it's just very uncomfortable. i mean literal pieces of meat, like he literally talks about their "thigh meat" and "drumsticks." god i almost threw up writing that. and sirancha's no help, she's just sitting there bidding on love live drinking glasses on ebay the whole time. why do i do this. do i hate myself THIS much?

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Porg Chatter #3: Soverign Porgs

May 11, 2018

In an all porg judicial system, nothing would get done...EXCEPT SNUGGLES AND HUGS! Sure, innocent men would likely be put to death, but you gotta break a few eggs.

BUT NOT PORG EGGS.

DON'T EVEN SUGGEST THIS, YOU MONSTER.

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Asterios Kills A Kid #4: Positivity: Fake It ‘Till You Make It

May 10, 2018
 
When they're not helping kids untangle their spaghetti brain, or getting them more views on YouTube, Asterios and Sriracha are helping mold our future cult leaders.

The Hour Long 5 Minute Podcast #2: You Handsom Son of a Bitch

May 9, 2018

We talk a lot about TV in this one! Because I was raised on TV, love TV, and will die holding a TV in my arms!

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Waifu Wars 003: The Madoka Magica Melee

May 8, 2018

Holy shit these three weebs will not shut the fuck up about some dumb cartoon where Sailor Moon girls make wishes and become god and then someone steals half of God's power by invading Sailor Moon "valhalla" and becomes the devil. I'm not kidding or exaggerating at all: that is what this show is about. I thought it was called "Mediko Mekaniko" but it's actually called "Madoka Magica" and the girls seem pretty cool but I kinda don't know why we have to have a dark take on Sailor Moon.

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BONUS: Is Science Friction Kino? with Mumkey Jones & Ass Burger

May 8, 2018

Yes, his name is "Ass Burger!"

On his second channel, my ol' pal Mumkey Jones has a movie podcast called "Is It Kino?" Last night, we decided to mash it up with some Science Friction, and record a knock down, drag out, incredibly civil discussion about Avengers: Infinity War.

Enjoy, and happy tuesday!

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Science Friction 022: #Keto

April 25, 2018

THIS WEEK'S MISSION:

THE GREAT VOYAGER DEBATE!!

No joke: my two guests Marly Halpern-Graser & Josie Campbell love Voyager. Josie likes it more than Deep Space Nine, which is insane to me, but god damn if she didn't make some pretty compelling points. We spend over a goddamn hour REALLY hashing out Voyager.   It's an intense thrill ride of non-stop pedantry, ONLY ON SCIENCE FRICTION!!!

 

THIS WEEK'S CREW:

Marly Halpern-Graser     |     @MarlyHG

Josie Campbell     |     @CozyJamble

 

PRODUCED BY ZWICK!!!

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Science Friction 021: The Guay System

April 13, 2018

THIS WEEK'S MISSION:

I talk with two of my favorite people – animation writers Marly Halpern–Graser & Josie Campbell school me on how to write for Batman, The Teen Titans, and pretty much all the DC superheroes that you've ever seen on Cartoon Network. 

Plus: we talk about how we're GOING to talk about Voyager, but never get around to it, so you'll hear that in the NEXT episode!

 

THIS WEEK'S CREW:

Josie Campbell     |      @CozyJamble

Marly Halpern–Graser     |     @MarlyHG

 

PRODUCED BY ZWICK!

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The Hour Long 5 Minute Podcast #1: “My Name’s Sheldon, Sheldon Cooper”

April 5, 2018

Welcome back to The Five Minute Podcast! It's a special series I do every once in a while for my patreon subscribers – they each send me a topic, and I create a special little podcast just for them. Enjoy this batch!

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